Three Ways to Buy Happiness
Spend on shared experiences, reclaimed time, and meaningful generosity.
- Difficulty
- Easy
- Time to result
- ~weeks to results
- Steps
- 4
- Confidence
- 98%
This allocation rule directs discretionary money into three uses supported by research Brooks cites from colleagues Mike Norton and Ashley Whillans: buy experiences, buy time, and give money away. Experiences work best when they add people and memory, such as a trip with a partner rather than solitary excess. Buying time means paying to remove a disliked task, then deliberately using the recovered hours for something valuable rather than scrolling them away. Giving works when the recipient or mission deserves support and genuinely inspires the giver; larger commitments warrant background work on effectiveness and stewardship. The method begins after basic needs are met, because money can reduce unhappiness by relieving deprivation. Its output is a spending plan organized around love, agency, and contribution rather than accumulating possessions.
Origin
Brooks summarized research by Harvard Business School colleagues Mike Norton and Ashley Whillans on spending patterns that can increase happiness.
Core principles
- 01Possessions mainly reduce misery when they meet genuine needs.
- 02Shared experiences strengthen love and memory.
- 03Buying time works only when the reclaimed time is used deliberately.
- 04Giving to a worthy cause can increase the giver's happiness.
How to run it
- 1
Separate need from surplus
Confirm that basic needs and stability are covered before applying the rule to discretionary money.
Pro tip Remember that escaping deprivation lowers unhappiness even when possessions do not keep raising happiness.
Watch out Do not donate or outsource at the expense of essential obligations.
- 2
Choose shared experiences
Spend on experiences that include people you love and are likely to create durable memories.
Pro tip Anticipation and later recollection can extend the value of a well-chosen trip.
Watch out An experience built around numbing or excess does not automatically create enjoyment.
- 3
Reclaim time deliberately
Outsource a disliked task when affordable and decide in advance how the recovered time will be used.
Pro tip Spend the time with someone or on an activity you genuinely enjoy.
Watch out Unassigned time can disappear into low-value scrolling.
- 4
Give with conviction
Select a worthy person or cause that inspires you and investigate meaningful commitments before giving.
Pro tip Concentrating help enough to change one life can make the impact tangible.
Watch out Do not confuse an unsolicited appeal with evidence of effectiveness.
In the wild
Ferriss described booking a family trip that relatives could anticipate for six months and discuss in group chats. He also planned future trips with close friends, saying the return on those experiences was huge.
→ The spending generated anticipation, shared time, memory, and stronger relationships.
Brooks said he and his wife give away 10 percent of income, often making one larger gift and smaller ongoing gifts. For substantial amounts, they research overhead, use of funds, mission, and sometimes the people running the organization.
→ Generosity becomes a deliberate family practice tied to causes they believe change lives.
Common mistakes
Buying time without a plan
Outsourcing a chore adds little if the recovered hours are frittered away on an activity that does not improve life.
Buying possessions for lasting elevation
Brooks argues that possessions help with deprivation but do not produce endlessly rising happiness after needs are met.
Is it for you?
Best for
It is best for people whose basic needs are met and who want spending to support relationships, freedom, and contribution.
Not ideal for
It is not ideal when spending or giving would compromise essential needs or financial stability.
From the transcript
“There are three ways you can buy happiness”
“you can buy experiences”
“Buy time. But use the time correctly.”
From the episode
#692: Arthur C. Brooks — How to Be Happy, Reverse Bucket Lists, The Four False Idols, Muscular Philosophies, Practical Inoculation Against the Darkness, and More
Arthur C. Brooks