The Working With Me Document
Write a user manual to yourself so new colleagues skip months of guesswork.
- Difficulty
- Easy
- Time to result
- ~days to results
- Steps
- 7
- Confidence
- 94%
A working-with-me document is a written user manual for you as a colleague. It covers tactical mechanics (which channel for what, how to use our one-on-one, what an FYI email actually means to you) and decision mechanics (how you form opinions, what evidence you need, how long you take). Critically, it also names your failure modes in specific behavioural terms, and it's written as a draft for comment rather than a proclamation — the value comes from the people who have worked for you telling you where it's wrong. In high-growth environments where someone may have four managers in a year, it collapses the get-to-know-you period and removes the anxiety that stops people asking for what they need. Best used reciprocally: they write theirs, you swap, and you start working instead of reading each other's tea leaves.
Origin
Claire was moderating a great-manager panel at Google around 2008-2009 when a winning manager described copying Urs Hölzle's user manual. She went back and wrote hers the same day, titling it 'the unauthorized guide' and inviting corrections. It was later published in Elad Gil's High Growth Handbook.
Core principles
- 01Anxiety in a new working relationship comes from unwritten rules.
- 02Make the implicit explicit — every guess you remove is time recovered.
- 03You cannot see yourself in a meeting; your team can.
- 04The document is a draft for comment, not a decree.
- 05Reciprocity matters — ask them to write one too.
How to run it
- 1
Bang out a first draft
Write your defaults quickly rather than polishing. It is an exercise in self-awareness, not a publication.
Pro tip Title it something disarming — Claire called hers 'the unauthorized guide' because she doesn't work for herself.
- 2
Cover channels and their meaning
Say which channel to use for what — one-on-one versus Slack versus text versus call — and what each signals. Define ambiguous conventions like FYI.
Pro tip FYI means 'no response needed' to some people and 'act on this now' to others, often splitting by generation.
- 3
Describe your decision-making
Explain how you actually decide: how fast, what evidence you need, whether you lead with intuition or analysis.
Pro tip Claire's reads: highly intuitive, will voice an opinion instantly — then asks for data to validate or overturn it.
- 4
Specify what information you want
Distinguish what you want to know from how you want to be reached — e.g. major life events on the team so you can send a note.
- 5
Send it for comment to people who've worked for you
Ask directly: am I anywhere near on base here? Invite corrections on both what you got wrong and what you left out.
Pro tip Others see things you structurally cannot — you are never in a meeting without yourself.
Watch out Expect at least one uncomfortable correction. That's the payoff, not the failure.
- 6
Add the sections the feedback reveals
Fold in the failure modes your team identifies, with the mechanism and the antidote.
Watch out Don't defend the original draft — the corrections are the whole point.
- 7
Share on day one and ask for theirs
Give it to anyone who starts working closely with you, and ask them to write their own so the shortcut runs both ways.
In the wild
Claire's first draft said: I'm not a micromanager, I delegate and trust you, and if I'm concerned you'll know. A report pushed back — on a sales compensation project he was leading, she had shown up in every meeting, read every document, and worked the spreadsheet. She had done it because it was the first comp scheme she'd ever built and she wanted to learn, but she never said so, so it read as pure micromanagement of a person better positioned than she was.
→ She added a section: when it looks like I'm micromanaging, I'm usually learning something for the first time — we should agree that up front, and call me on it if I don't say it.
Before circulating the draft, Claire gave it to a longtime colleague who had become her chief of staff. Her note: you never acknowledge that you like good craic — I've never been in a meeting with you where we didn't laugh at least once. Claire felt awkward writing 'I'm funny,' but the point was different: she values humour in meetings, and no one can observe that about themselves.
→ A section on humour and meeting tone was added; the document has barely changed since 2009.
Common mistakes
Writing it as a list of demands
Framed as 'here's how to make me happy' it reads as self-absorbed — a criticism Claire's published version received. Frame it as reducing the other person's anxiety.
Skipping the review round
Self-report alone encodes the flattering version. The corrections from people who've worked for you are where the real content is.
Writing it once and never sharing it again
Its value is at the start of every new working relationship, not at the moment of writing. Send it to each new close collaborator.
Is it for you?
Best for
Managers in fast-growing organisations where teams and reporting lines change several times a year.
Not ideal for
Anyone who would write it as a list of demands rather than an aid — it reads as egotistical if the framing is 'how to make me happy.'
From the transcript
“a working with me document is basically trying to write your own user manual”
“there's anxiety when we first work with someone... just tell them tell them how to work with you and then that reduces the anxiety”
“that's the kind of thing that you don't know because you're never not in a meeting with you”
From the episode
#724: Claire Hughes Johnson — How to Take Responsibility for Your Life, Create Rules That Work, Stop Being a Victim, Set Strong Boundaries, and More